I know it's been a while. Please forgive me. I've been caught up in the "worry mode" again. What's that you ask? Well, it's when you get so caught up in what might might or might not happen that you forget to enjoy what is.
God gave me a very poignant reminder of this today. Funny how we can think we've matured and grown beyond the mistakes we've made in the past, and then we make the very same choice—just in a different form.
Mine was a house. Yes, you read that correctly. A house. This was my family's dream house. We built and landscaped it ourselves. It was perfect. Or so I thought. I began to worry. Did I have the right plants? Did I have the right paint? Did I have the right furniture? Did we build our deck the right way? I got so caught up in all these worries, I fogot to just enjoy and treasure God's provision.
It took a picture of this house to remind me I was doing the very same thing with writing my book. I went into "worry mode." Will it be good enough to publish? Do I know enough? Am I a good enough writer? Am I falling behind my writing friends? Am I following God's leading? Am I writing for the right reasons?
Hmm, do you see the pattern. I'm realizing worry can only happen when "I" is in the middle of it, not God. So many times I'm remined of this, yet I continue to forget and repeat my mistake.
Next time "worry mode" kicks in my prayer is that the "I" will be replaced by "God." I may not know what the right way is at the moment, but God sure does.